Bean Head Is Cool Because.................

This post is copy and pasted from SHRED WALES
A lot of people think Beanhead isn’t cool. But he is. He’s the coolest skateboarder in Newport. See below for the reasoning;

He’s purposely not fashionable. You won’t find him in a fashion hat ever! Unless he’s being ironic and taking the piss out of Beefy by double bluffing Beefy into thinking that he’s forced John into trying to be fashionable (and what John has really done is time and time again made Beefy look like a desperate closet-case who craves attention and compliments that he rarely gets for his outdated late ’90s Limpy Bizket fashion sense.).
He rides a massive skateboard really fast. Don’t take my word for it check out the Video From The Vaults below.
He has a very manly job breaking cars to bits. Most of the younger boys don’t even have jobs, unless you count being a skateboarder as a job (which I don’t, statistically). If Tom Bailey worked in a chinese takeaway and would give me free food I’d think he was as cool as Beanhead, but he doesn’t he’s just trying to better himself by learning something in University, which is pointless and selfish and he looks Mexican.
He has one of the best headlocks in the skateboarding world. I’m 23 years his senior and he still got me to tap out in a recent wrestling battle. Don’t let him get his forearm around your neck and you’ll be fine as his punches and overall technique isn’t that powerful……………………….yet.
He has a nice little dog that he takes photos of and puts on Facebook.
He’s an existentialist who lives for today and doesn’t even need a future or a past.
His head looks like an unspecified Bean.
I’ve never seen him with his shirt off which means, deep down, he is not a selfish poser and has a lonely tenderness that no one can experience, but his mother and Elvis.
He IS Banksy (bad luck on the Oscar nomination dude).
See the nine other points above.
BEANHEAD I SALUTE YOU!!!!!!

Over and Out

Lt Meat